Lisa Khalyavchenko and her mother Valentyna Babych "My advice to all mothers who will follow the same path: treat your children the way you would treat ordinary children. Show them that they can do anything - and if they believe in it, they will succeed if you support them, love them and believe in them."

Liza Khalyavchenko, 18, and her mother Valentyna Babych

м. Pokrov (Dnipropetrovska oblast)

About music lessons

Lisa: I'm a musician. I play the piano, I play a lot: Tchaikovsky, Bach, Beethoven. I love it! Now I am preparing a concert - "Moonlight Sonata", it will be my solo concert. I invite everyone to come to Pokrov!

Valentina: She likes meaningful works. She is very fond of jazz and blues. She doesn't have a single favorite composition - she gets the most pleasure from those pieces that she feels with her soul, and she puts all her emotions into the performance. If only you could hear them playing the Moonlight Sonata in four hands together with their teacher!

Lisa: My teacher Olena Viktorivna is my second mother. I have been studying music with her for 10 years. She is my best friend!

Valentina: We went to music school when we were 8 years old, and since then we have been studying with this teacher. She still has no methodology for teaching such children, and she explained everything to Liza the way she understood it, the way she saw it. Then came the results, although we didn't strive for that, we wanted Liza to play music just for motor skills, for general development.

Lisa is very short, so at first the teacher would sit her on her lap and tell her stories about music and how to put a pen. Unfortunately, we didn't set out to develop a teaching methodology for children with Down syndrome, so the materials were not preserved, and now many parents are asking about it. Recently we gave a master class in Kyiv, at a specialized center, and it seemed that the teachers had prejudices against us, thinking that it was impossible to play at this level - but when Lisa sat down at the instrument, they understood everything. But we can't pass on the basics, the basic exercises, to anyone.

Lisa: I play not only by myself. I also play four-handed with my teacher, and I used to play in an orchestra in Kyiv. It was very, very interesting!

About international competitions

Lisa: My mother and I traveled a lot to performances and competitions. We went to St. Petersburg for the first concert. Then we went to other countries, in order: Hungary, Romania, Bulgaria, Austria, Italy, France, and the Netherlands was the last. We were invited to festivals, we went, and I played the piano there, and then I received diplomas, medals, and cups. In Bulgaria, I had my first victory, the grand prix! I was the best there! Everyone applauded a lot, congratulated me.

Valentina: Interestingly, abroad you are perceived quite differently, as an ordinary child participating in a competition. Everyone treats you very correctly, and that's why you have a great desire to go there and prove yourself.

When Lisa started practicing and showing results, Lesia Lytvynova, a volunteer, found out about us. She wanted to do a project about talented special children. That's how we found out that in the Netherlands, in Amsterdam, there is an orchestra in which all the musicians are exclusively people with special needs. And about two years later, when this orchestra came to Kyiv, we were invited to play with it. Lisa was very pleased with this, and later President Poroshenko organized a trip to Amsterdam for two weeks! We played with the orchestra and it was a great time. The most interesting thing was that such people live a normal life there: they are employed, and in their free time they rest their hearts and souls in this orchestra. Lisa was even invited to take the place of their elderly pianist who was looking for a replacement. We were surprised to see that the level of performance of Lisa and the Dutch is very different: they play with one finger, one note at a time. They do this to show that such people can also play music, and Lisa plays professionally. So they were interested in Lisa staying there, but... if I were younger (I'm 62 now), we would not have missed this opportunity, for Lisa's future. Because no matter how hard we try, we have no future in Ukraine: our happy childhood is over, and after we turned 18, we were left with our music school, and that's the only joy we have.

Nowadays, all competitions are remote, meaning that you can send your work and participate. But in Lisa's case, it's not easy: she gets a return, she likes to perform on stage and realize that people listen to her and approve of her.

About the hobby

Lisa: I have friends, many friends at the music school and at the art school. I can name many: Eva, two Alinas (one with braids, the other with glasses), Nika, Olya, Sasha, Yana, Nikita, Danka - these are all my friends. We laugh and talk. I'm friends with everyone! And soon it's my birthday, and I'll invite them all to the party.

Valentina: Lisa is very well-liked at the music school, everyone says hello to her, invites her to play - but they don't let her into their world completely. But I hope that we will have closer friends, not only those whom she considers to be friends, because they are kind to her.

Lisa: I also go to art classes, and I draw very beautifully. I love Petrykivka painting, I studied at an art school. I paint flowers and birds. I draw on boards, bottles - on everything. I also go in for sports. For my health, so that my back doesn't hurt and my muscles are healthy. I go to the music every day, and I go to the drawing as well. It's like going to work! And sports - twice a week.

My dream is to go to college to become a teacher like Olena Viktorivna. Then I will teach children music and play the piano for them. This is my dream.

Valentina: Of course, it is very difficult to realize such a dream here. Even if you graduate from college, it will be difficult to find a job in a small town, and no one wants to take on that kind of responsibility.

About education

Valentina: There were almost no difficulties with the kindergarten: when I came to enroll her and told them that she had special needs, they told us that everyone has special needs now. Everything was quite correct. Of course, it was not without its pitfalls, but I am very grateful to all those people who invested in Lisa and instilled in her a love of work.

Later, Lisa went to a regular school, in a regular classroom, and I sat next to her at the desk. In fact, we developed our own teaching methodology: these kids can't remember a lot of things if you present everything dryly, so you have to teach them through associations. Lisa and I learned colors this way. For some reason, it is believed that they have a limited memory - in fact, it's not like that at all, it just works differently, at the level of associations. We learned colors, letters, and numbers this way. Of course, at first the school principal was surprised that I, an adult woman, was sitting in the classroom with her, but I told her that no one else could teach her the way she needed to be taught. In fact, I was her teacher's assistant until the eighth grade, while we attended school. But it so happened that we don't have a certificate of education, which is a shame because we invested a lot in it.

"My advice to all mothers who will follow the same path: treat your children the way you would treat ordinary children. Show them that they can do anything - and if they believe in it, they will succeed if you support them, love them and believe in them."

Lisa: At school, I loved math most of all. I loved numbers, counting, and solving examples. It was my favorite subject! It was interesting to solve equations, to look for x. Fractions, problems - I love it all.

And I love Cossacks very much! Hetmans, atamans, and I like Bohdan Khmelnytsky the most. My mom and I went to Zaporizhzhia, where the Zaporizhzhia Sich was. My eyes saw everything, how the Cossacks lived, how they rode horses. At first I read a book about them, and then I visited them and saw how beautiful they were, with sabers. I also saw a performance of how they fought the Tatars. It was very interesting, it was like my eyes were opened! My pictures from the book came to life.

I also have a motto, a poem: "Every child has the right to a family! To love, to care, to a happy existence."

Valentina: We learned this poem when we were six years old and memorized it very well. Although Lisa didn't speak at all until she was five, she only made gestures. And I used these gestures later when I taught her, showing her poems, for example.

About life in a small town

Valentina: Being a small town has its advantages: Everyone knows Liza, she is in the newspapers, so people pay attention, praise Liza for being such a good girl. It's nice. Both the administration and the mayor know us. But the problem is that we have already participated in everything we can: we have attended all the clubs, music and art schools, and there is nothing more.

Liza works very hard, she is never lazy. She is used to doing a lot of things - since childhood, we have been going to various sections and clubs, looking for something that would interest her. It turned out that music and drawing were her favorite things - she is so creative. And she is very fond of order: apparently, this was instilled in her in kindergarten, as if she had learned the algorithm.

I am often told that I am a good mother for not giving up, but I believe that any mother in such circumstances would have done the same. When Liza was born, I was 43 years old, and I heard a lot of terrible things. But I didn't give up because it was my child, and I was putting everything I could into her. I was sure that everything would be fine, that we would manage, with God's help. Of course, it's not easy, because you need to practice every day to maintain your level and develop further.

Lisa: I help my mom dust, vacuum, and wash the dishes. And when my mom works, I also help her cook. I make salad, and in winter I make olivier, and I'm good at it! I cook borscht with my mom, peel vegetables. I go to the store and to the market. My mom tells me what to buy, and I go and buy everything - I always remember what I need to buy. Most often, my mom sends me to buy fresh soft bread and milk.

Valentina: My advice to all mothers who will follow this same path is to treat your children as you would treat ordinary children. They are members of society just like everyone else, and they can learn along with everyone else, and they can learn both school and extracurricular programs. Show them that they can do anything on an equal footing with others - and if they believe that anything is possible, they will succeed if you support them, love them and believe in them.

The interview was prepared within the framework of the All-Ukrainian project of the National Assembly of People with Disabilities of Ukraine "Rights of Women with Disabilities: Action in Development". The project is funded by the State Budget of Ukraine.

Texts of stories: Valeria Lazarenko.
Illustrations for the booklet: Yelyzaveta Yablonska